A Secret. Don't read unless you care about me!

I haven't posted much, you've probably noticed. I will tell you a secret; I have a mild case of bi-polar disorder. I vowed to be honest on this blog, so why not tell. As I went to pick up my prescription for my meds 2 weeks ago, at that time- they informed me that, "my insurance company was  now fighting paying for my meds." After years of being on this medication, all of a sudden, I had none. No warning.

I have slipped progressively downhill since.

For those of you who don't understand depression; it's real. I've been fighting it all my life. I've come to the conclusion that most of it, not all of it, but the majority of it is hormonal and hereditary- for me at least.

So without getting into gory detail, I got a letter today, (gee- thank you! I think, United Healthcare!  "Congratulations, we are now paying for your medication!" once again). Do I owe them a metal? What if it were heart medication?

I am feeling hope. My energy level and my plain existence has sped down to almost non-existent, consistently wanting to do nothing, letting the devil kick in in most areas. I am happy to report I haven't had any major "episodes," praise the Lord! I will admit though, I did want to call the insurance company and let them experience first hand, an "episode." But I didn't. I was actually able to hide it from most people. Sorry to my friends, I am a great actress.

Unfortunately, though, not my loving family. I'm sorry guys. Thank you for still loving me unconditionally!

So, all that being said, I have struggled with my eating big time this past 2 weeks. One minute wanting to gorge, the next wanting to starve. I have, however, somehow managed to walk ONE mile every day. Not sure how.

I pray to God for Him to lead the way. The devil loves my bi-polar disease, he's pounces on me like you wouldn't believe. But I WILL NOT let him win!!

Comments please.